Dunes and Tremors

Thought you heard it all? Stand by!

In a peaceful, alleged water-starved area in our beautiful country lies the Palouse. Idaho and Washington State share this rich farm land with a mythical creature that has been spotted less frequently than Bigfoot.

However, there is a move underfoot by our conservationist corp to make the giant Palouse earthworm an endangered species. The Obama administration is being lobbied to make it so.

Jodi Maynard a professor at one of America's think tanks (University of Idaho) has no doubt of its existence. I opine that if she had to bankroll the effort to locate and then subsequently capture one of these critters that ... there would be no search. However, never fear the U.S. Government comes riding in to the rescue.

Maynard proudly produces a vial that encases a partial remnant of the legendary giant worm that wowed movie fans in Dune and the television hit (lol) Tremors. Except this prodigious worm isn't 25 foot long, or even 6 foot long. In fact it may very well be only 6 inches long.

So much for the "giant" moniker. In fact to date there have been only four sightings. But despite this reality government funds (aka tax dollars) are being used to fund this nonsense. Maynard and her researchers are going to use what they consider a "NEW METHOD." One of their crude methods at locating the wily worm is to stick an electrical pole into the ground, then shock the little ferocious beasts out of their comfortable abodes, and get them to come out into the daylight. That's funny, as a nine year old lad I fondly remember my brother and I catching night crawlers in my grandpa's back yard using the same methodology. That was in 1961.

"New," I'd say this whole mess is hardly a genesis of originality. To me, in these times of recessionary life in America this is quite old. Another pork program that goes forward with research, when good hard-working Americans are being laid off their jobs at the University of Idaho et. al.

When will our tax dollars be spent appropriately? Scientist Karl Umiker is on the scene and has stated "I'm kind of bummed we haven't seen anything yet." Well Karl the American public is bummed that Congress keeps spending money, and we haven't seen any results from the massive bailout either.

Imagine that everyone is bummed. Now where is that Sasquatch, perhaps we could put another grant together to go find him. While you're at it Congress, why not search for the unicorn?